“We must become the change we want to see.”
— Mahatma Gandhi
It’s 2017, I’m driving to my date’s place for the last time.
After three months of dating, I asked her earlier that day If she wanted to start a serious relationship with me.
She said no.
She wasn’t looking for something serious at the moment.
She said, it’s better to go our separate ways from now on.
I was heartbroken.
After dropping her off and wishing her the best.
I’m driving home sad with tears in my eyes.
This was the first woman I ever dated and the first one to reject me.
I did not know how to feel, I thought I had what it takes to be a boyfriend.
I got home.
walked to my bedroom.
Closed the door
Jumped on my bed
and started crying.
Nothing could comfort me.
All I ever wanted at that point in time was to have a girlfriend for the first time.
I’ve had none after being alive for 23 years.
I felt worthless.
My ego took a big hit.
The next few days I coped with my sadness by playing video games (PUBG) and watching anime (Naruto).
During those days all I did was to think about what I did wrong.
What I didn’t do?
What I didn’t have?
After a few days of introspection.
I concluded the following:
- Lacked self-confidence.
- I had a lot of insecurities.
- Not much experience dating women.
I wanted to have the confidence of Tony Stark (Iron-man), the leadership of Captain America and the body of Thor.
That was the person I dreamed of becoming but never put the effort to work on those qualities.
I was tired of my own sh*t, it was time to start taking action.
One of my biggest insecurities was my body.
I didn’t like the way I looked. Too frail and thin.
I wanted to look manly and strong so that I could attract women and go on dates.
And the way to get there was by building muscle mass with strength training.
This is how I started going to the gym and my “why”
At the beginning of my fitness journey, I didn’t have a personal trainer or workout partner to show me the ropes but that didn’t stop me.
I learned on my own how to build muscle, how to build your own training program and nutrition principles by watching videos and reading science articles on the internet.
I trained consistently for 15 months.
Watching my body getting stronger and lean motivated me to keep training month by month.
I was no longer training to find love, I was training because it made me happy and I wanted to become the best version of myself. Strength training became a part of who I am.
In conclusion, getting rejected turned out to be a pivotal life lesson.
This experience led me to the path of self-improvement and fostered personal growth, instilling in me the qualities of resilience and determination.
It helped me take proactive steps in conquering my insecurities and discovered a hidden passion for fitness and nutrition.
If you recognize something you’re not fond of about yourself, then research on how to overcome that weakness, create a plan and execute.
It doesn’t get better until YOU get to action, you need to make it happen.
Get out of your comfort zone and evolve.
This is how I transmuted a negative experience into a positive learning outcome for self-improvement:
- Live through a negative experience
- Analyze and dissect the negative experience with an unbiased perspective
- Find out what you did right and what you could’ve done better. (Write it down)
- Set actionable steps in areas of improvement
- Execute the plan with intention.
With enough time and experience you will improve your weaknesses or insecurities.
I promise.
Whenever you are ready this is how I can help you:
- Get your 14 day trial on my fitness app.
- Private 1 on 1 weight loss coaching.